In days of clunky technology
State-of-the-art was misery.
Had to read telex, slimey fax paper,
Wireless File on top newsmaker.
Wang was crashing while ambassador waiting.

Now in web-world au courant’s no fuss
With Gates, Jobs, Brin, and Intel chips
Instant messaging on the shuttle bus,
For Google-eyed interns, cells on their hips.

Wherever I go in Info Age cabs,
There’s two of me, thanks to Linden Labs,
One for the office, shared with the wife,
While my avatar takes calls in Second Life.

At FSI, I’m techno-keen,
Aldacs queuing on the office PC
While I’m in class with the plasma screen
Picking up Tunis on the DVC.

Trainees getting the IT buzz,
How we’ll hit our targets with America.gov.
Except for the odd last-three-feeter,
Handshake-at-a-time meeter and greeter.

Now the metrics nano-par
Personal touch in the retirement seminar.
Click my homepage about the next webchat,
In the cubicle is where it’s at.

Even when traveling, On-the-road assistant
Has retired. Any message the chief might lob
Will be fielded by my fob
Or my BlackBerry instrument.

FAM says business class no more?
Keeping in touch today’s a snore.
3:10 to Yuma, redeye to Lima?
Tourista class muy bueno
Mucho legroom for my iTelefono.

Now I’m LinkedIn 24-7
Riding a cloud in cyberspace heaven.
When work calls, it’s now or never
Breakfast, supper, bedtime hour.
Kids asleep or crying in bed.
I’ve tuned ‘em out, Bluetooth in my head.

Even in church, when the preacher’s weary,
I’m texting with the Secretary.
Don’t mind me, an earthly zombie,
But in the ether with the Almighty.